Manage the Manic
A few weeks ago I was as happy as a lamb enjoying the sunshine in Melbourne, Australia. It was warm, it was new and was/is populated by some very lovely people.
But then I came back to northern Europe and my mood dropped like an icy stone as the temperature plummeted and all the world's problems alighted on my shoulders.
Then I was off to the UK where I was able to forget again as tiredness and work overwhelmed my senses. I loved it: then I was back home again and unable to escape the horrors that surround me. My mood swooped down into subterranean depths again, my only escape being sleep.
I'm not going into the details of why this is happening, they're far too complicated and personal, but I will say that they involve every major area of life. In other words money, work and my private life.
If you're like me and seem to be trapped in an ever-spinning world of negativity, what do you do to get through it? The best I can do is to try not to think about it and keep putting one foot in front of the other - which works when you're desperate, but it isn't a long term answer it?
On a good day I can cheerfully laugh at all the bollox that comes my way, but that's just bravado. It ain't going to cure nothing. On a good day I try to work my way out of it by taking action, but without someone there with a whip, it's very hard to stick to the plan. Hopelessness creeps in to my head and paralyses me and the best I can do is hide in a book or tune out in front of the TV. And working from home and being an amateur novelist don't make it any easier either. Both contribute hugely to feelings of isolation, and if any of you have or are trying to get published, you'll know exactly how tough inhabiting the world of the unpublished author can be.
I'm not expecting any sympathy here, but I would like to know how people break through negativity and the loneliness it brings.
My latest plan is to rise at 0600 every day and get on with writing my 2nd novel (working title: Life Cycle) but that means getting to bed by midnight. And getting to bed at the time (and going to sleep) is not something I'm good at.
I can do it, but I'm sure many people will know that going to sleep means waking up, and waking up means facing the day again: at night nothing can touch you.
A few weeks ago I was as happy as a lamb enjoying the sunshine in Melbourne, Australia. It was warm, it was new and was/is populated by some very lovely people.
But then I came back to northern Europe and my mood dropped like an icy stone as the temperature plummeted and all the world's problems alighted on my shoulders.
Then I was off to the UK where I was able to forget again as tiredness and work overwhelmed my senses. I loved it: then I was back home again and unable to escape the horrors that surround me. My mood swooped down into subterranean depths again, my only escape being sleep.
I'm not going into the details of why this is happening, they're far too complicated and personal, but I will say that they involve every major area of life. In other words money, work and my private life.
If you're like me and seem to be trapped in an ever-spinning world of negativity, what do you do to get through it? The best I can do is to try not to think about it and keep putting one foot in front of the other - which works when you're desperate, but it isn't a long term answer it?
On a good day I can cheerfully laugh at all the bollox that comes my way, but that's just bravado. It ain't going to cure nothing. On a good day I try to work my way out of it by taking action, but without someone there with a whip, it's very hard to stick to the plan. Hopelessness creeps in to my head and paralyses me and the best I can do is hide in a book or tune out in front of the TV. And working from home and being an amateur novelist don't make it any easier either. Both contribute hugely to feelings of isolation, and if any of you have or are trying to get published, you'll know exactly how tough inhabiting the world of the unpublished author can be.
I'm not expecting any sympathy here, but I would like to know how people break through negativity and the loneliness it brings.
My latest plan is to rise at 0600 every day and get on with writing my 2nd novel (working title: Life Cycle) but that means getting to bed by midnight. And getting to bed at the time (and going to sleep) is not something I'm good at.
I can do it, but I'm sure many people will know that going to sleep means waking up, and waking up means facing the day again: at night nothing can touch you.
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